The Feels

Feelings are so crazy, man. They can change SO quick. I can feel one thing now and another a second later. There are some unfortunate downfalls to being an impulsive person who desperately wants to live and love in the now, but gets caught up in today’s society where everything has to immediately mean some sort of serious commitment. I haven’t yearned to give that exclusive longterm commitment to anyone I’ve met thus far in life. I get commitment. I want it too at some point. But what if when I am finally ready the other person isn’t? After all, there’s been numerous times someone was ready and I wasn’t. Maybe because I knew ultimately they weren’t the one for me, or maybe they were but the timing was off. I feel when it really is the right person and the right time, we’ll both know, wholeheartedly. It’ll work, we’ll click in a way we’ve never clicked with anyone else. It’ll be comfortable, it’ll be familiar. A part of you, you didn’t know was incomplete will feel complete and discovered. I think I’ve finally reached a point in my life where I’m ready to accept every good thing that is coming my way. I’m ready to embrace it, appreciate it, and reciprocate it.
The most beautiful people I know are the most damaged/afflicted souls. Their chaos is alluring. Their chaos is addicting. It’s relatable, but in a way which remains mysterious and almost unattainable. It shows their humanity in the rawest form but immortalizes them because of their brave and candid vulnerability. So many of us have been conditioned to hide our most purest and honest forms because of fear of appearing weak or lost. Fear of needing help. Fear of wanting to be loved. I know this feeling. I felt it for years until I learned the darkest times are actually really the most beautiful in hindsight because they create the most necessary life lessons and art. I also learned that it’s okay to need someone. We all need each other. It’s okay to not always have it all figured out. It’s okay to not always be strong about everything. It’s okay to breakdown and cry. It’s okay to feel alone and lost. It’s okay to have your heart broken. It’s okay to be reborn with every new moment. It’s okay to be confident. It’s okay to be happy. It’s okay to cut people out of your life. It’s okay to move on. It’s okay to be in your feelings. It’s okay to be in tune with your emotions. Society has the popular tendency of portraying emotional people as weak. It’s bullshit. All feelings and emotions are energy, it’s all about what you choose to do with that energy. You have the ability to create something powerful. It starts with you as an individual. Be the change you wish to see in the world. Be kind and gentle with each other. Be patient and understanding. Live and love completely. Break barriers. Break stereotypes. Inspire.
-Addi

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