a chaotic calmness

Do we choose what we feel? Are we selective to our own thoughts?
The chaos in my mind exists, and I think it always will, which I’ve come to terms with and oddly, I appreciate. It challenges me, keeps me striving and pushing for more. It forces me to test my limits and in turn strengthens me. Comfortingly however, a large part of me knows I have nothing to worry about, every little thing is gonna be alright. It may sound cheesy, but ever since I was a little girl I’ve always believed and really known, had this deeper intuition in my core that the universe has something wonderful planned for me, as long as I do my part. A large part of me puts my trust and faith into the universe. Even though things may not always be exactly the way I want them to be, things will always work themselves out as long as I continue to do what’s right for me. As long as I continue to stick to my moral beliefs, as long as I make the right choices; stay optimistic, grateful, kind, and honest. So I’m at peace. I usually am, but sometimes the chaotic side seeps in more prominently. We all have a dark side. I’ve found, I’m happiest when I’m an exact balance of my dark and light side. Yin and yang. You gotta take the energy from the chaos/darkness and let it drive you, allow yourself to benefit from it. Get yourself centered and once again find your peace. Keep the balance, the equilibrium.